Hurt and Disappointment; developing the fruit of the Spirt to overcome!
As I process this past month, the lost of my mother-in-law unexpected, and having daily encounters with her son, my “x”; (secular vernacular), provided time for me to practice the “fruit of the spirit” for the situation which included but limited too, self control, kindness, gentleness and long-suffering. As I reflected over the last 30 days, what really transpired was dumbfounding, I watched the Lord, in the mist of loss, prompted me, and guide me, not to make it about Shelley Campbell, but allow Him to develop more of the “fruits of the spirit“ in me. However, on the other hand, I had opinions coming in from family and friends sharing their thoughts on how I should operate, and navigate these virgin waters. The feedback consisted of, “wonderful of me to help my “x” after all he did to me“, btw, they mentioned they wouldn’t have been so nice. Other remarks included, he doesn’t deserve you or your help, and or he’s this or that! But at the close of the day listening to their feedback and sitting quietly with the Lord, I asked myself, who do I want to serve and be more like? The answer was easy, JESUS. Muting the flesh question; who do I want to glorify shelley campbell, or be the hands and feet of Jesus and I knew and felt the answer. It is more important to me to glorify Jesus, and allow my children to witness forgiveness, grace, mercy and longsuffering so they can share these attributes when situations are difficult. Also, I am trusting the Lord to use my obedience for His Kingdom and others; isn’t that the reason why we are here? I am committed to be a Kingdom Builder (KB). KB prerequisites include similar skills as “fruit of the Spirit”; long suffering, patience, surrender, forgiveness and grace just to name a few. (Galatians 5). Keep in mind, these are the same qualities (prerequisites) I want my Lord and Savior to share in my life. Without Jesus being the main focus of our lives, we don’t have His nature to give away, and this is why we experience: hurting people hurt people syndrome. Believe me, my character, behavior, and actions comes with a high price tag, decades walking closely with the Lord, studying His Word daily and killing the flesh minute by minute. But once I started this relationship and acknowledging my need for Jesus, and learning to submit and obey, while not being led by my pain, and forgiving those that have trespassed against me and my family, and finally, while letting go of the need to be right, I could begin the journey of healing. It takes all the pressure off of me as I WAIT for His response to my situations, pray about everything, and know He’s in the reconciliation and restoration business, I am not concerned with the outcomes. Whatever it looks like, I will be okay with the outcome because this is only the dress rehearsal! God Bless